


Cygnet

by Rouhn



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Family, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2017-09-22
Packaged: 2018-09-13 09:21:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9117514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rouhn/pseuds/Rouhn
Summary: THIS is a collection about the Swan-Jones family. Different situations during her pregnancy and when their daughter CYGNET is born.Mostly Emma, Killian, Henry and Cygnet stories. But the people of Storybrook especially Snow, David and Neal will also appear.





	1. Jake and the Neverlandpirates

**Author's Note:**

> I have to small kids at home and they love „Jake and the Neverlandpirates“ - I once read a fanfiction about Hook watching Peter Pan and I thought writing something like this might be fun. So Cygnet (Emmas and Killians daughter) is about 7 here (I dont know if someone aged 7 will still watch Jake and the Neverlandpirates but it wouldn't work if she is much younger/older)  
> Have fun reading – maybe I'll write more Cygnet/Emma/Killian/Henry fics – I quite like the idea of them having a sweet little girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Killian watches "Jake and the Neverland pirates" for the first time with his daughter...

They had never told her. They decided not to. Together. Although Killian never wanted to hide something from his daughter, especially not about his past. She knew who her grandparents were, who nearly everyone was in town. But she was too precious, too innocent to know who her father really was. Killian loved his little daughter but there were things she didn't need to know. Other kids in town didn't even know anything about the whole „in another life we were fairy tail figures“. As people weren't able to go back to their old lifes they adjusted and accepted being in the modern world.

Emma was at the Sheriff Station, Killian in the kitchen and Cygnet and two of her girlfriends sat in the living room in front of the television.  
Killian took the tray filled with a plate with sliced fruits, three cups of juice and cookies and went into the living room. 

"What are you watching, girls?" The two girls giggled while they watched him moving towards them; his daughter didn't even look. Killian placed the plate and cups in front of the three. With curiosity he watched the TV show while walking over to the huge diner table. 

"Bloody hell, that's crap", he suddenly said after watching the show a bit. "Dad!", Cygnet said and turned. "Pardon, sweetheart, but these are all lies. There have never been any baby pirates on Neverland nor was there an island where they could have lived on." 

"And how do you know?", one of the girls asked annoyed. "Well, as I've been...", he started but stopped immediately. He looked at the three girls who were looking at him in anticipation. "I just know", Killian said and looked down. The three girls rolled their eyes and turned their attention back to the tv show. They watched in silence. 

"Bloody hell. Who is this?", Killian suddenly asked and appeared next to the couch. 

"Daaad", Cygnet sighed. One friend of her smiled widely. 

"That's Captain Hook." 

"He clearly is **not** ", he protested. 

"Yes he is. And that's the Jolly Roger, his ship. And his crew. Mr Smee, Skipper and Bones." 

"That's not Mr Smee and the Jolly is a two master not a one master and who the hell are Skipper and Bones? And where is the rest of the crew? He can't sail the ship only with three others and - bloody hell, the girl has pixie dust? Where did she find that? It's quite rare and..." 

"Daaad! You are embarrassing." Killian looked at his daughter apologetic. He walked back to the diner table murmuring. However he wasn't able **not** to watch the show. 

"Oh come on, there is no volcano on Neverland. Where did these people get their informations? It's all wrong."

"How do you know, Mr Jones?", one girl kneeled on the couch, looking at him curiously. Killian didn't say anything, he scratched behind his ear and looked at the girls. 

"Oh my god", the little girl turned back to Cygnet, "isn't the name of your dads ship Jolly Roger?" Cygnet lifted her head. 

"And didn't your dad have a prosthesis?", the other girl whispered. Cygnet turned her head, looking at Killian directly. 

"Oh my god, your dad thinks he is Captain Hook", Cygnets friends bursted into laughter. 

Cygnet only stared at him. In her eyes pure realisation. While her friends were still laughing and giggling, Cygnet got up and went to her dad. She hugged him tight. Killian's heart stopped. He didn't know if he should say something or not. He hugged her too. 

"Your secret is safe with me, Captain", she whispered and kissed him on the cheek. He watched her walking back to her friends. 

_How the hell should he explain this to Emma?_


	2. Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> how Snow and Charming found out that Emma is pregnant and Henry overheard something he shouldn't

 

 

"Snow, I think you forgot an ultrasound of Neal", David blurred and took the picture. He never was able to see anything in these pictures except white, grey and black spots.

Snow White came to him, holding Neal in her hands. Emma followed her. "What did you say?", Snow asked smiling.

 

"I said you forgot to put an ultrasound picture of Neal into the babyalbum." Snow wrinkled her nose. "Definitely not. The album is complete."

 

Killian entered the room, he looked at the others. "Hey love", he smiled at Emma but she didn't return it. He raised an eyebrow; when he saw what David held in his hand, the second shot up.

 

"Okay, than maybe someone looked at it and it fell out?", David went on and looked at Emma and Killian. "No, dad", Emma answered and wanted to go on but was interrupted by Snow.

 

"Give it to me", she said; Emma and Killian exchanged looks. "I think that's not necessary", Killian said and scratched behind his ear.

 

"So you took the album?", David said tilting his head in confusion. "No, dad", Emma said again. Snow suddenly seemed to understand. "David", she said calmly, looking at Killian and then at Emma, "maybe we should sit."

 

"I think we can discuss this right here. Just ask next time when you take the album. And when you break it, just ask someone to help you replacing it."

 

Emma sighed. "Dad, this isn't mom's ultrasound." "Of course it is, whose should it be?" Emma sighed again, looking at Killian. "Emma's", Killian said and stepped a bit back. "Right, Emma's", David said and smiled.

 

But not for long. His face went white, his smile faded slowly. His hand, he held the picture again, started to tremble. "Maybe we should sit now", Snow said and gave Neal to Emma. "Nooooooo. No. No. No", David said and looked at Killian. It was a deadly look.

 

Emma looked at her baby brother. She couldn't do anything against it but tears welled up behind her eyes. She knew it was just his first reaction and in a minute or so David would be more than happy, but seeing him like this and hearing him made her sad.

 

"David", Snow tried to calm him and shoved him to a chair. "Mate...", Killian started but David was quicker, he jumped at him, shook him and started to yell at him.

 

"That's **my** daughter we are talking about. You knocked her up? Really?!", he was furious and Emma's heart broke. She gave Neal to her mother, turned and ran.

 

"SWAN!", Killian pushed David, who fell back. He ran after her, ignoring the shouts of David.

 

He outran her in the hallway. "Emma", he said calmly and pulled her to his chest. She cried and sobbed while he stroked her hair and whispered loving words in her ear. "He is not mad with **you**. He doesn't know how to react. His baby girl is going to be a mommy." She nodded but didn't move or say anything.

 

"Emma?", David said, standing behind her. "I am sorry, honey. I was so surprised, I...I...", he stuttered. Killian looked at him, although David was his mate he was angry with him and on the other hand he did understand him. "Maybe I give you a minute", he said and beckoned David. Killian kissed Emma's crown of the head and pushed her into David arms. David said a voiceless "thank you" and watched Killian walking back to Snow.

 

* * *

 

"She okay?", Snow asked when Killian entered the loft. "Aye." He sat down and took the picture David left. "And are **you** okay?" He raised his head, meeting her eyes. "I remember David freaking out when he found out I am pregnant." "He did?" "Of course. Sleepless nights. Secret drinking sessions. Private talks with his mates. The full program."

 

Killian sighed and looked at the picture again. "I want that child, I do love it so much - and it's not even born yet. But I am afraid like hell."

 

"Why?" Killian looked at her.

 

"First of all I am more than scared to lose Emma. What if anything goes wrong? So many women miscarry or die in labor."

 

"Killian, not in this realm. Yeah it's true, something can happen but you will see, prenatal examinations are a regular thing here. You do not have to be worried about. I promise." Killian sighed.

 

"And what about this?!", he raised his hook.

 

"What's about it?"

 

"What if I hurt the baby. It's an innocent infant, not able to defend itself. And when I wear my prothesis I am afraid of having no feeling and drop it."

 

"That won't happen."

 

"And the worst of all, I have no father qualities. Not at all. My father abandoned my brother and me. I wasn't a good man, a honorable man. I killed people, betrayed others. I was fearsome and fearful."

 

"Killian, Killian!", Snow tried to calm him down. "That doesn't matter, Killian. You will be a wonderful father. I see you with Henry and Violet; I see you with Alexandra and with Neal. You have a big heart and you clearly love Emma and that is everything that counts."

 

"But..." Snow White raised her hand to stop him talking. "You also have David and me. We will always be there for you." Killian smiled at her, he wanted to say something but suddenly Emma interrupted him.

 

"You'll be a wonderful father. I can't think of a better one. You care for me, for Henry, for my whole family. You followed me through time and realms. Maybe you are inexperienced, but so am I. This is also new for me. I was alone and imprisoned during my last pregnancy, I had no one. Now I'm not alone anymore and I know we can handle it." She winked at him and smiled. "This will be the most loved kid in every realm, ever."

 

She stepped closer and wanted to hug him when suddenly the door slammed close. Emma turned and saw David's face. "Dad?"

 

"I think you have another problem." Emma looked confused, so David went on. "Henry."

 

"Oh my god. How much did he hear?", Emma went white.

 

"Enough", David answered honestly and touched her shoulders.

 

"You know what, Swan? I'll get him." Killian got up and walked towards her.

 

"You sure?", she asked blinking away some tears.

 

"Do you trust me, Emma?" He kissed her forehead. "I'll find him and bring him home."

 

She nodded and let him go.

 


	3. operation cygnet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Killian and Henry talks about Emma's pregnancy

"Lad? Are you alright?"

"Go away, Killian." Henry turned a bit, burying his face between his knees, his arms holding them pressed against his chest.

"Henry, look, I am sorry you had to hear the news like that. Neither Emma nor I had any intentions in telling you this way." He sat down next to Henry, not invading his personal space, but close enough to have a private conversation. "We never wanted to tell Snow and David first, it just happened."

He heard Henry sniff and turned his head. His heart broke, for Henry but also for Emma. After David's outburst, he had hoped that Henry would be more supportive. Henry didn't respond, didn't even look up, so Killian went on.

"Look, lad, I don't know how you feel at the moment, but what I can tell you is how I feel and to be honest I am more than scared." Henry shifted slightly, but didn't say anything. Killian sighed and nodded. "Okay, Henry, I won't push you. I told your mum, I would talk to you and here I am, but I do understand when you don't want to talk about it. Fact is, that we cannot undo it. You are going to have a half brother or sister in about nine months and Emma and I would be very happy if you could be happy about it."

Henry looked up, he felt miserable, he wasn't a ten year old anymore, he was almost an adult and Killian was right, things couldn't be undone. "I **am** happy", he confessed suddenly.

Killian raised an eyebrow. "You are?"

Henry nodded, letting go of his knees to sit up straight. "I am sorry I ran. I was just so surprised. Maybe I was angry too, but of course I am happy." He looked at Killian shyly. "At least a bit."

Killian looked at him lovingly. "How about we just sit here for a bit longer?" Henry agreed and stared onto the water. The waves were crashing against the shore, the smell of the sea soothed them. Killian didn't know how long they stayed like that but suddenly Henry raised his voice again.

"Why are you scared, Killian?" The question hit him out of the blue.

"I beg your pardon?" Killian raised an eyebrow confused.

Henry sighed, again looking at the sea and the passing ships. "You said you are scared before. Why? What about?"

Killian scratched his neck, looking at him sighing. "Well, I faced so many dangers in my past, but this is new for me. It's something I can't control, something which frightens me."

"Do you think mom is scared too?"

Killian thought about it, he wasn't entirely sure if he should tell him, but he decided to have no secrets. "Yes, Henry, I think your mother is very scared. You know the circumstances of her last pregnancy and birth. She was all alone and no one was there for her..."

"But we are now. We will be in it together, won't we?"

"If you want to, we would appreciate it. Henry, I don't want to replace your dad or push you out of your mother's life or shut you out completely. I want to be a part of this family and the little duckling growing in your mothers belly will complete our little family and luck. Won't it?"

Henry nodded but fell into silence again. "Can we make a secret operation out of it?"

"Of the pregnancy?" Killian asked suspiciously.

"Yes, you know, go to the library, read about the whole pregnancy stuff, about mood swings and what we can do for mom to help her trough all of it? But I don't want to be involved in any gross things."

Killian laughed and shook his head. "Well lad, I think your mother won't want to share this stuff either. But I like the idea of making an operation out of it and I like the idea of doing some research about this whole pregnancy stuff."

"Maybe grandma has some books. Shall we go and ask her? How... how will we name the operation? Baby swan? Little duckling?"

"How about something not that obvious?"

"What about operation manatee?"

"Henry!" Killian shook his head hastily. "Do never tell your mother you had this suggestion. How about we find a code name which isn't related to anything big or bulky? How about opossum? I think I read once they only carry for 14 days or so and I think Emma won't be suspicious at all."

Now Henry looked at him deep in thoughts. Suddenly he shook his head. "As much as I'd love having a secret operation with you, Killian, I think we should choose something obvious, so she knows nothing is going on and she can feel reassured?!"

Now also Killian thought about it and nodded. "Well thought, Henry. So pick a name and then we head off to the Charming's loft. How about some ice cream first?"

Henry got up. "Thanks Killian. Let's start "operation cygnet"." Killian looked up.

"Operation cygnet?"

"Cygnet is a baby swan and as my mom is Emma Swan, I thought it fits."

Killian slapped him on the back and smiled. "I'm full aware what a cygnet is, lad. I like the name."

They went to the ice cream shop and back to the loft. Talking and smiling when they entered the loft. Emma looked up surprised. Henry went to her and hugged her. "I love you mom. Congratulations."

Emma looked over his shoulder, meeting Killian's eyes. She smiled when a single tear escaped her eyes. Killian nodded at her smiling. Snow went to him and placed his hand on his upper arm. "See, Killian, you **are** already a great dad."


	4. mood swings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma is having mood swings, Henry and Killian's POV with a fluffy ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emma is pregnant for about eighteen/nineteen weeks -> as it is her second pregnancy, so Emma's body is already used to some things and although she might not remember well, her body does.

Killian closed the door quietly. He looked at Henry cautiously. "Not a word, lad", he whispered, beckoning him over, "your mom is having a heavy mood swing. I suggest we leave her alone for a while and come back later with a box full of ice cream and tissues."

 

Henry looked at the door with a frightened expression. Being in a house with an expectant woman with mood swings was one thing. Being in a house with an expecting woman with magic was a whole other one. They heard another light bulb burst and he nodded at Killian. "Let's get out of here."

 

He went to his wardrobe and pulled out a long rope with several knots in it. He fixated one end at a metal loop Killian did install several weeks ago. He threw the other end out of the window, looking at Killian who just nodded.

 

"HOOK!" Emma yelled downstairs, making another light bulb shatter.

 

"Hurry up, Henry. I faced many monsters but I think I never was that scared of any before." His face was serious.

 

Henry shivered and climbed out of the window, followed by Killian. When they hit the ground they started to run, fully aware that Emma might find the rope and that this was the last time they could escape that easily.

 

They went to the docks, finding shelter on the Jolly Roger. Henry grabbed a book and sat on the cod while Killian took a journal and started to write down some notes. He decided to write to his unborn child, still not sure if he would ever give it these letters. But it calmed him, sharing his deepest thoughts with it, telling what was going on at the moment. Sometimes he wrote about Liam or his childhood or adventures he went on or he wrote about Emma or just about the weather and what was going on in Storybrooke.

 

"Shall we call her?", Henry suddenly asked without even looking up. Killian shook his head and mumbled something, but Henry didn't understand it. He closed his mouth and started reading again. He liked these quiet moments with Killian aboard the Jolly.

 

They never went sailing without asking Emma (she would be too worried, so they just sat in Killian's quarters reading, talking or in Killian's case writing). Time flew by and when Henry looked at his watch he was surprised how much time has passed by.

 

"I think we should go home. It's been over two and a half hours since we left the house." Killian looked up surprised.

 

"We've been here for so long? Aye, you are right, your mother will wonder where we are and we don't want to upset her again, do we?"

 

Henry shook his head and put the book back on the shelve, Killian put the journal back into his drawer. "Come on, Henry, let's go."

 

On their way home they bought a box with eight different type of ice cream and a box of tissues. Slowly they entered the house through the front door.

 

"Emma?", Killian was the first to look for her.

 

"Mom? You here? Killian and I brought ice cream."

 

Killian looked at him in awe. "Nice stroke, telling her we have what she wants right away so she won't harm us for renegading."

 

Henry nodded smiling and placed the ice cream on the counter, taking out three bowls and spoons. He looked around seeing shattered glass on the floor and decided to sweep it up while Killian checked the second floor for Emma.

 

Killian cautiously opened the door to their bedroom finding Emma lying on it curled up into a ball. "Emma? Sweetling, are you alright?"

 

"I am a miserable woman and mother", she said sobbing and Killian smiled at himself. Her outbursts always were the same. Yelling - destroying something (mostly with magic and without wanting it) - feeling miserable for using magic - curling up with her boys in front of the tv (mostly with ice cream, popcorn, pickles, chocolate or everything the same time). When Emma thought she was a bad person, it was safe for him to be near her.

 

"Why do you think that, Emma?" He entered the room and looked at her caring.

 

"You and Henry always run when I have a mood swing. I use magic even against you two." She sobbed and buried her face into her pillow.

 

"Oh sweetheart, you never do this on purpose. Henry and I do understand and..."

 

"why do you always leave?"

 

Killian sat down and stroked her back. "I am sorry, we thought you want to be alone when it happens and to be honest we are a bit scared."

 

"Oh", another wave of tears hit Emma. Killian turned her around and pulled her into his lap.

 

"Henry and I love you, you know that, do you?" She nodded. "We are in this together, as a family. We don't want to leave you alone." She nodded again. "Do you want us to stay with you in the future?" She nodded once more.

 

Emma felt like a five year old girl, she curled up against his chest, leaning her head against him, enjoying his embrace, only wanting to feel safe for once. "I love you, Killian."

 

He stroked her hair and kissed her head. "I love you too, Swan." He put his hand on her stomach. "And I love you little duckling. Don't make your mummy's life so hard, okay?!"

 

"Ow", Emma suddenly stiffened and looked at Killian with her eyes wide open. "It kicked."

 

Killian looked at her shocked. "What?"

 

"I said it kicked. Our baby kicked me." Emma started to smile broadly. She put her arms around Killian's neck and hugged him close. He also put his arms around her. Irritated and still shocked. Why did it kick Emma, why was she so happy about it?

 

"The ice is melting", Henry's voice was echoing through the house. Emma laughed and looked at Killian.

 

"You brought ice?"

 

"As always, love." She kissed him and got up. She offered him her hand smiling.

 

"So let's go. The baby wants its ice."

 

He nodded and got up. "I assume it's a good thing the little duckling kicked you, isn't it?"

 

"Yes, Killian. It is. So we know everything is alright." She smiled at him and he at her.

 

"Is it true we can find out our baby's sex?" Killian suddenly asked curious when they went downstairs, their fingers interlaced.

 

She looked back at him smiling. "We have an appointment next week, eventually we find out then."

 

"How can they do that, I mean I understand that they can look inside you with this realm's magic, but how do they know what sex it will be? You hardly see anything on these pictures.”

 

Emma smiled at him and pulled him close to herself when they sat down on the couch. She loved when Killian got excited about something. He was as curious as an eight-year-old. Discovering all the advantages and technologies of this realm. She loved him even more for it.

 

“The doctors look at these ultrasounds every day. They see.” She kissed him before she finally ate a spoon full of vanilla ice cream. Killian nodded but didn't respond. Emma was sure he was deep in thoughts, trying to find out any answer he was looking for by himself.

Henry started a light conversation with Emma, Killian was quiet, holding and stroking her from behind.

 

When it was time for bed, Killian watched her undress. She was so beautiful with her baby bump. For some days it was obvious that Emma was pregnant, the swelling of her belly getting bigger everyday. Killian loved her even more. His swan was a beautiful woman but knowing his little duckling growing inside her made her even more beautiful. Sometimes it seemed as if she was glowing, as if something from inside made her gleam.

 

“You are doing it again. You are staring at my belly.” Emma put on one of Killian's shirts and crawled next to him onto the bed.

  
“I am just staring because you are such a beautiful woman.” He pulled up her shirt to expose her stomach again. Emma laid back and watched him eagerly. He opened the drawer of his nightstand and put out some baby oil. “May I?” She nodded and beamed at him. She loved their little ritual.

 

Every evening (except before an ultrasound appointment) he rubbed some oil on her belly. It was calming for both of them. He was talking to their little duckling or humming an old sailor's melody. He was exploring every bit of her belly, covering it with kisses. He was listening to Emma's heartbeat, staring at the baby bump for hours. “I love you so much, little duckling”, he suddenly said and kissed her belly. Emma's eyes were closed, she was smiling and enjoying their quiet time.

 

Killian put back the baby oil and covered Emma's baby bump before he laid next to her. “I love you, Emma. Thank you for sharing everything with me.”

 

Emma turned a bit to face him. “You are going to be a great dad, Killian. Thank you for being there for us.” He kissed him and added smiling. “I love you.”

 

They stayed like that for a while before Emma snuggled against her pirate and fell asleep. Killian stroked her hair for a while longer before he also fell asleep. Happy having his family with him, happy for finally finding his happy ending with his swan.

 


	5. the journal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cygnet and Killian find an old journal on the Jolly Roger

„Dad, what's this?", Cygnet asked and picked up a dusty object. She and Killian were on board of the Jolly Roger. Although they hardly sailed her, Killian insisted in keeping her clean. What her dad didn't know was, that Cygnet came here more often than she told him.

She loved the ship, she loved how it rocked under her when she sat or laid on the cod, thinking, daydreaming or just wanting to relax. Her iPod plugged in, listening to her favorite music. She especially loved the smell in the captain cabin.

Cygnet knew many stories about the Jolly Roger, about the Jewel of Realms, about her dad's adventures. She envied him although she knew that it clearly was dangerous out at sea. Sometimes she felt left out in town. Being the kid of the Saviour and Captain Hook, being the granddaughter of Snow White and Prince Charming, the sister of the author put some pressure on her. She wasn't special, had no magic, had no special fighting skills, was not the best in school – she was average.

"Bloody hell, that's from Liam", Killian suddenly said and held the satchel high in the air.

"Which one?" Cygnet asked interested and stepped closer.

"My older brother. The naval officer", Killian answered and looked at his daughter. She looked at the satchel with wide eyes. Killian smiled at her. She was a beautiful lass, dark blonde, nearly brown curls, bright green eyes. He could see Emma in her, but also his elder brother. It weren't only the hair, it also was her behaviour. She read very much, was a great listener, she always had clever and wise ideas and advices. But she also got his temper. She was brilliant in swearing, what Emma drove mad. When Killian and Cygnet started a heated discussion it always ended in a kind of a swearing duel. Sometimes Killian was surprised and impressed by her choice of words. He often forgot that he was her father not her mate.

"I wished I would know what he looked like" Cygnet sighed. She always tried to imagine, when her father told her one of their stories, but it would be much easier to have a picture. "Can I open it, dad?"

Killian wasn't quite sure if he should let her open the satchel but he had to admit, he was curious too. "Come, let's sit on the cod."

Cygnet nodded and sat down, she leant against the wall and waited patiently. Killian looked at her and took the satchel. He opened it carefully and turned it, so that all items fell out. Cygnet's eyes widened. There was an old feather and an ink bottle; there was a small book which looked like a journal. There were a few coins and a handkerchief with two letter stitched on it.

"Dad?" Cygnet asked and placed her hand on his good one, "Are you all right?"

"Yes, I am just surprised I haven't found this earlier." Cygnet nodded understandingly. She grabbed the journal and opened it. She flipped through the pages. Every single page was full. It was a neat handwriting, some sketches, formulas and other things. She looked at her dad again. He looked pained, these things belonged to his beloved brother, his idol, his eldest friend. A man he honored every single day, a man he loved so much. She hastily put the journal back and crawled to him.

Before he could say anything she hugged him. "I love you, dad." Killian pulled her on his lap and hugged her tighter. "I love you too, sweetheart." He looked at the belongings of his brother and made a decision. "Cygnet, if you want them, these items shall be yours." She broke the hug and looked at him bewildered.

"Are... are you sure, dad?" He put a strand behind her ear and nodded. "Aye, Cygnet, I am."

Suddenly she wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in the crook of his neck. Her curls tickled Killian's cheek and neck. He held her close, aware of the intensity of this moment, he stayed quiet, stroked the back of his daughter slowly.

„Thank you" Cygnet said quietly, not breaking the hug. Killian kissed her hair, rubbing her back. Cygnet finally broke the hug, looking at him with watery eyes. „I love you, daddy."

A big grin appeared on Killian's face. He loved these quiet moments with his daughter. She only opened up when the two of them were all by their own. „I love you too, sweetie. How about we head to Granny's to fetch some food on our way home?"

Cygnet nodded, sliding down his lap, packing up the things into the satchel again. She turned around when she noticed a single piece of paper lying on the ground. She picked it up and turned it in her hands.

„Oh my god" she suddenly said breathless, the satchel and her other belongings fell to the floor with a loud noise which made Killian turn. He saw his daughter staring at the piece, tears streaming down her face.

„Cygnet? Darling? What's wrong, sweetheart?" He went to her and put her arms around her. She turned her head, looking at Killian with wide eyes.

„Are this you and uncle Liam?" Her voice was shaky, the words coming out barely louder than a whisper.

„Bloody hell." He took the drawing, smiling when he saw the familiar image of his elder brother looking back at him. Liam was laughing, his arm put around Killian's shoulder who was also smiling broadly. Killian swallowed thickly. „Aye, Cygnet, this are Liam and me. Where did you find it?"

„It laid there on the floor. Dad!" She wrapped her hands around his neck again not holding her tears back anymore. Killian knew how much that picture meant to his daughter. He pulled her closer.

"Liam would have loved you so much. You are so much like him. I am so proud of you, Cygnet." He kissed her hair, holding her close. "Shall I tell you another story of him before we go home? I think your mum will understand. She knows how easily we forget time on the Jolly Roger."

Cygnet nodded, wiping away her tears. They sat down on the cod, Cygnet leaning against her father, listening to the words carefully. This story was another one for her collection. Last Christmas Henry gifted her a leather bound journal. The day after Christmas Cygnet started to write down all the stories about Liam and his father. She knew she would never be as good with words as her brother or her father but she wanted to keep the memories alive.

One day she would show her father the book but for now it was her own little secret.


	6. nursery rhymes

5 little pirates jumping on the bed, one fell of and bumped his head

First mate called the Captain and the Captain said: No more pirates jumping on the bed!

 

* * *

 

 

Killian was fascinated by the modern nursery rhymes, one by one turned into a pirate version, making their little lass giggle and bubble all along.

Emma often caught him in the nursery, bouncing their little girl in his lap, wiggling her and humming a familiar melody. Emma adored and loved him even more for that.

Killian was a wonderful father. He cared much for Cygnet, was always careful and protective. All insecurities gone long ago. Emma loved watching them while she pretended to do something else.

One late afternoon when Cygnet was extra cranky, she watched Killian fooling around with her, making their toddler scream in excitement. If anyone had ever told her that the fearsome and threatening Captain Hook would be that good with kids - with **his** kid, she would have laughed about it.

Now she was witness of the truth. Killian was unbelievable. One second Cygnet was crying and screaming, the next moment she was giggling and laughing. Killian always knew what to do and what to say to her. Cygnet was a daddy's girl and Killian was totally in love with his little girl.

While washing the dishes she saw Killian walking on his knees towards Cygnet singing „the sailor went to sea" - Cygnet squealed in delight, watching her father coming closer and closer. When he finished the first verse (he refused to thing any other verse of the nursery rhyme) he started to tickle Cygnet making her laugh even louder.

Emma was so proud of Killian. She was so happy, so at peace. She felt very guilty about working again although Killian assured her that it was totally okay for him, that he was happy to have a task again, to look after their little daughter.

 

**„ _Lavender's blue, diddle, diddle_**

**_Lavender's green_ **

**_When l am King, diddle, diddle_ **

**_You shall be Queen!"_ **

 

The words filled the room, making Emma's smile even broader. This was a nursery rhyme Killian always sang to Emma long before Cygnet was even born. He told her that this also was a common song back in the Enchanted Forest. Cygnet squealed and Emma decided to stop watching them but joining them instead.

„Look, baby, Mommy is coming. Shall she sing for you too?" Killian looked into Emma's eyes who sat next to him, kissed him briefly and pulled Cygnet into her lap.

„Mommy doesn't sing. That's a daddy's thing" Emma huffed but grinned.

Killian shook his head. „But I love your voice, my beautiful Swan. Don't deny your stunning voice to her." He turned to Cygnet who played with Emma's hair. „Say please mommy sing for me."

Emma smiled but shook her head. Killian sighed. He started to hum a melody. Emma watched her daughter looking at Killian in anticipation.

 

„ _As I was walking_

_Down the street_

_Down the street_

_Down the street_

_A pretty girl … „_

 

„That's not how we sing it, Killian." Emma interrupted him.

„So tell me love, how do you sing it?" Killian asked challenging making Emma sigh but then she started to sing.

 

_As I was walking_

_Down the street_

_Down the street_

_Down the street_

_A very good friend_

_I happened to meet_

_Hi Ho, Hi Ho, Hi Ho._

_Rig a jig jig and away we go_

_Away we go, away we go!_

_Rig a jig jig and away we go_

_Hi Ho, Hi Ho, Hi Ho!_

 

Cygnet started to squeal and bounce in Emma's lap. Killian pulled Emma back, so she was sitting between his legs. She leant back against his broad chest. „How about we sing something together where we can also entertain our little pirate princess?"

Emma looked over her shoulder, raising her eyebrows confused. He kissed her cheek smiling. Then he placed is arms around Emma and started to sing „Row Row Row Your Boat". Emma smiled as he mimicked rowing a boat and started to do the same.

The rest of the afternoon the two of them sang and laughed and made fun for and with their daughter until Cygnet fell asleep in Killian's arms.


	7. pregnant 1.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> version 1 of Emma telling Killian that she is pregnant
> 
> a version I wrote a long time ago, I still like it but I wasn't so sure if this is the way Emma would do it after everything they've been through

 

"Swan?", Killian looked at her concerned. She sat across him in one of Granny's booth. He looked at Snow and Charming, both were sitting next to her.

 

Emma stirred her cocoa, not paying attention. Snow looked at Killian, she tried to find out what was going on, but Killian just shrugged.

 

"Emma, honey, is everything alright?", her mother asked and tapped her on her shoulder. Emma jumped, she looked around.

 

"I'm sorry, I need some fresh air", with this words she got up and left the diner. Killian looked at his drink.

 

"I don't know what I have done. She is acting that strange since yesterday. She is not paying attention to anything I say, I am not allowed to come near her nor touch her."

 

"She didn't seem to pay any attention at all. I don't think she is just avoiding you, Killian."

 

Killian looked down, he felt more than uncomfortable. "I think I'll stay at the Jolly for a while. Just in case I've done something irremissible." He also got up and smiled weakly at David and Snow.

 

"David", Mary Margaret hissed and nodded towards Killian. David rolled his eyes and got up.

 

"Wait, I'll join you."

 

"Thanks, mate, but I think I should figure out what's going on by myself."

 

David nodded and patted him on the shoulder. "Good luck."

 

Killian nodded too and left the diner. Emma was gone. He had hoped she would be standing outside but there she wasn't. He sighed and walked to the docks.

 

He stepped on the Jolly. He breathed heavily and climbed down the ladder to the captain cabin. "Hey," a voice said, making Killian jump. He looked at the corner where the voice came from. "I'm relieved you came here," the voice continued. Killian stepped closer.

 

"You knew exactly that the Jolly Roger is my retreat," he answered coldly and opened a cupboard next to him. He grabbed two tumblers and a bottle of rum. "Would you be so kind and tell me what I have done?" He poured the amber liquid in one glass, than in the other. He took the glasses and offered one to his counterpart.

 

Suddenly the other one stepped closer and hugged him tightly. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to avoid you", Killian held Emma close when she suddenly started to sob. "I love you so much. I am so sorry, Killian." He was irritated.

 

"Tell me what is going on, love." She shook her head, still holding him.

 

"I can't."

 

"Please, Emma. Talk to me. You know you can tell me everything."

 

"Killian," Emma sobbed and buried her face on his chest. He stroked her hair, kissing the crown of her head.

 

"I love you, Emma. Whatever is going on. I will always love you." Emma still didn't say anything. She cried until she ran out of tears. Killian has never seen her that vulnerable. "Come, let us sit", he said and guided her to the cod.

 

"No, I can't." Now, Killian was totally confused.

 

"What do you want, Emma?" She looked at him, eyes red, puffy and tired.

 

"I have to go."

 

"Talk to me, Swan. Please." When she climbed up the ladder he yelled at her. "Swan!" He ran after her, but she was gone - again. He went back down and grabbed the rum. Damnit.

 

* * *

 

Emma was totally confused, she didn't know what to think, didn't know what to do. Why did she have to find out? Everything was perfect until yesterday.

 

She wanted to be with Killian but it hurt so much seeing him. She knew what will happen, she knew what he will say and do. And she was not ready. Not yet - maybe never. The big question was what she's going to do about it.

 

Talking to Snow was no option - keeping secrets wasn't her strength. So she decided to run - alone - as always.

But honestly running away was also not an option - she wasn't able to leave Henry behind, her parents, her brother and also Killian. Damnit.

 

* * *

 

 

"Killian?" It was already dark, Emma was sitting on the couch in front of the tv. Henry came downstairs.

 

"Hey mom, everything alright?" She smiled, but it wasn't an honest smile. "Hey kid, yeah everything's alright. Is Killian home?"

 

"Nah, haven't seen him the whole day." Emma nodded disappointed. "I am out, mum. See ya tomorrow" Henry suddenly added, his back bag over his shoulder.

 

"Where are you going?"

 

"Jason's. I asked this morning if I can sleep over."

 

"Oh" Emma thought about the conversation but she couldn't remember. She got up and put on her leather jacket. "I'll walk you."

 

"MOM." Henry whined.

 

"Let me spend time with my son. Besides I head in the same direction, so..." Henry accepted and nodded. (if he was honest he loved this quiet moments with his mother but he would never admit he liked her admiration)

 

She kissed him good bye when they reached Jason's house and walked to the docks. Again. She must do it. She didn't want to be alone. "Killian?", she asked, waiting on the gang plank. He appeared a second later and looked at her surprised. "Permission to come aboard?" she asked carefully. He nodded and made a gesture with his hook.

 

Emma took a deep breath and stepped on board. "We need to talk, but I..." she looked down nervously. Killian stepped closer and placed his hand and hook on her upper arms. "Love, you can tell me everything."

 

"But what if you leave?"

 

"Swan, don't you get it - there is nothing in the world that could tear me apart from you." Again welled tears behind Emma's eyes. "Love, you scare me. Please tell me what's going on."

 

Emma sniffed, she looked at him, playing with the hem of her shirt. "Emma, have I done something wrong?"

 

"Yes, no, I mean...", she sighed. "Killian, I...I...I am pregnant."

 

* * *

 

Killian looked at her confused. He waited for an explanation, anything - but he only saw Emma's look. She seemed to be afraid, she seemed to be frightened. "Is this a disease?", Killian asked slowly.

 

Emma's sobs suddenly turned into giggling and than into laughter. All her sorrows seemed to be washed away in an instant. "No...Killian, I...I am with child."

 

Killian's eyes blew wide. "You what?" He stepped a bit back. He never thought about being a father. He once did when he was with Milah but she never wanted kids. He thought about the time back in Neverland when he took care of Baelfire. He thought about Henry, about Baby Neal, the first time he was allowed (or better forced) to hold him, he thought about looking after Alexandra.

 

"Killian?" He looked up, Emma stood in front of him, looking at him in shock. He had been deep in thoughts, not paying attention to her. Big tears ran down her cheeks, her whole body trembled.

 

Killian shook his head. Emma seemed to misinterpret his gesture, her face went white. In an instant he grabbed her and pulled her close. "Emma", he said, holding her close.

 

* * *

 

_"Killian?", Emma whispered, afraid of his reaction. He stood in front of her, his forehead wrinkled, deep in thoughts._

_"Killian?", she asked a bit louder, she needed him, she needed a reaction - anything._

_She could handle any reaction, but she couldn't stand the awkward silence._

_"Killian", she said again, observing his face, his expression - his reaction._

 

_Suddenly he stepped back. Her worst nightmares became true. He will run - any second he will be gone. She will be alone again. Not alone alone of course but without Killian; the baby without a father. She could feel that her break down was close._

 

_Suddenly he grabbed her and pulled her against his chest, he held her firmly, showing her that he wouldn't go away._

 

"Emma," Killian said while he held her close. His hand was in her hair, his hook on her waist. "Why were you afraid of telling me, love?" Emma placed her hands on his back and hugged him tighter.

 

"I was afraid that you would leave."

 

"Are you still afraid?"

 

"Yes."

 

He cupped her face, kissed her sweetly. "Don't be." Suddenly a big grin spread across his face. "I definitely won't go."

 

"But..." Emma looked at him anxiously. Killian put a strand behind her ear. "Emma do you want this child?" Emma looked directly in his eyes.

 

"My whole life I was alone, there was nothing I had for my own. I had no home, I lost Neal, I lost Henry, I lost everything. Then Henry found me. But I had to share him with Regina. Than I found my parents, who now have Neal. Than I found you. You were always mine. Mine alone. And now..."

 

"Are you afraid of losing me to our baby?" He sounded surprised but neither offended nor angry. She slowly nodded, not able to look into his eyes. "Emma, look at me", he lifted her chin. "You will never lose me. I won't leave you, I won't leave our baby, our family. You are everything to me. And this", he placed his hand on her flat stomach, "this little lad will make everything even more perfect." He kissed her forehead, kissed her lips, still placing on hand on her belly.

 

"So you want that baby?" she asked quietly.

 

"Of course. Emma you made me the happiest man alive and now with this baby you make me the happiest happiest man alive. I love you." He lifted her and spun her around. "This baby is you and me; how dare you think I won't want it?"

 

He placed her back on the ground and suddenly the dam bursted. Again. Emma smiled but cried and sobbed, not able to stand alone. Killian held her up, showered her face with kisses. "I love you so so so much, my beautiful swan.“ He bent down and kissed her still covered stomach. “And I love you little duckling.”

 

"We love you too, Killian."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there will be a second version of Emma telling Killian about the pregnancy


	8. pregnant 1.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the other version I wrote about Emma telling Killian that she is pregnant

~~~~"KILLIAAAAAAN!"

Killian nearly slipped when he stepped out of the shower. He wrapped a towel around his waist and stumbled down the stairs hastily.

"Emma?!"

"In the kitchen" she answered with a shaky voice. He looked to the right, seeing her stand with yellow cleaning gloves on her hands, staring at the sink.

"What is it, darling? Another spider?" Killian came closer. He loved his brave Swan and her dislike of spiders. (Especially since her meeting with Gideon's former pet)

He looked into the sink but it was empty except some remnants of suds. He turned his head seeing Emma's pale face. "Emma?" He touched her upper arm slightly, making her jump. "Hey", he pulled her into a hug, "tell me what is bothering you."

"Look", she said, peeking over his shoulder. He turned his head seeing nothing. He turned again looking at his wife questioningly. "There on the sink, look over there, Killian."

He turned his head again, spotting a long plastic stick. "What's that?" he asked confused.

"A test" Emma answered, burying her face at his bare chest, inhaling his unique, fresh scent, relaxing under his grip.

"What for?" He stepped closer, not letting go of Emma. "Is this some kind of love test? Don't you think we are beyond this?" He kissed her hair and looked back at the stick. "But I have to say I like the result if it's a love test - there are two matching symbols, that must be something good."

Emma still didn't react. "Swan? What kind of test is this and why are you not answering me?" He pushed her a bit off, looking at her directly. "Talk to me, Emma."

"Killian, this is a...", her voice died in her throat. She was afraid telling him, she was afraid he would dash off, leave her, abandon her like everyone before. But it was Killian. Her true love. Her husband. Her saviour. She took a deep breath, locking eyes with him.

He lifted his hand and wiped away the tears rolling down her cheeks. "It's okay, Emma. I am here for you. I vowed to always stay by your side, a promise I am going to fullfil my whole life. No matter what. As long as you want me by your side I will be. I love you."

Emma smiled happily, a small sob escaped her mouth. "I love you too", she said before she hugged him again.

"Killian, I... we...", she looked up meeting his calming blue eyes. Why was it still so hard telling him? Why was she so afraid of telling him?

"Swan, you are making me nervous. Please tell me what kind of test you made? Are you... are you ill?"

Emma smiled at him, she adored him so much, him and his concerns, him and his ability of comforting her, of loving her unconditionally.

"Killian, we are pregnant." She watched him directly. She saw the colour of his face drain. She saw the falter of his smile. She saw the panic in his eyes. She felt his grip tightening, felt his breath speeding up. "Killian?"

Tears stung her eyes, she couldn't watch him any longer, she tried to free herself but Killian pulled her closer. He buried his face in the crook of her neck. "Swan... Emma... that's... I... are you serious?"

Emma nodded, not able to speak. He pulled her away and beamed at her. "That's bloody fantastic. That's... Emma, are you alright? Are you not happy?" He looked at her concerned, even a bit hurt. "Don't you want that baby?"

"Killian... of course I want that baby, I just was so afraid that you might... that you don't want to... I... I'm sorry" Emma babbled and looked at him embarrassed.

"Don't be. I understand but I will not leave. Bloody hell, Emma, I cannot believe… we are going to have a baby… a little lassie or a little lad… Emma…" He pulled her close again, tears dropping on her shoulder.

„Killian, are you crying?" Emma pushed herself off him, getting rid off her gloves. She cupped his face, wiping the tears away with her thumbs.

„Apology, love" Killian mumbled, his cheeks flushed with a light shade of red.

„Never apologize for being a loving or caring husband" Emma pulled his lips down to hers and kissed him softly.


	9. a new pregnancy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma Swan swore one thing - no more kids, not after what happened during Cygnet's birth
> 
> but now she is pregnant again, will she tell Killian right away? Will she keep the baby?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to get this out of my system - some days ago my son's godmother's daughter had her first birthday and that was a very emotional birthday
> 
> her birth didn't went well, we nearly lost her and her mother and we worried for weeks if she is alive and will survive - so this is for Marlene, I love you honey

_"Never again a baby, Killian. I can't do that again, I am sorry, but-"_

 

_Killian laid his hand on his wife's hand to calm her down, to show her that everything was alright. He gently squeezed it. "It's okay Emma - you don't have to apologise. It's your choice, it's your body and I totally understand."_

 

_Emma looked at him, tears in her eyes. "I was so afraid, Killian,” she said hoarsly._

 

_"Me too, love, me too. I am just glad that you and the little duckling are alright." He looked at his daughter who slept in Emma's arms. She looked so peaceful and small but also so happy and content._

_Emma nodded and leant against her husband's shoulder. "I don't know what I've done when I lost you or the little one."_

 

_Emma closed her eyes, the memories of the last few weeks rushing through her brain. The fear,_

_the unknowing, the anxiety. She shook her head looking at her husband again._

 

_"Me neither. I know next time someone **will** die and I cannot risk that."_

 

_Killian kissed the top of her hair, holding her close, looking at their small daughter again._

 

"Ms Swan - Emma!" Emma looked up, staring at the blonde man in front of her. "Did you hear me?" She nodded slightly still staring at him shocked. "Emma, are you alright?"

 

"How far am I?"

 

"About nine weeks."

 

"Until when is an abortion possible?"

 

"An abortion? Emma, are you serious?"

 

Her eyes met his, the confusion clearly written over his face. "When it isn't Hook's, you know I am the last person to tell. Everything we talk in here is confidential."

 

Emma narrowed her eyes. "Of course it's Killian's baby," she snapped back, crossing her arms in front of her body.

 

Whale lifted his arms in surrender. "Woah I was just asking. After all you asked right away about abortion. An expecting mother should ask other questions and not-"

 

"I don't want that baby." Emma stated and looked down, tears forming in her eyes she did not allow to fall. "I cannot go through this emotional rollercoaster again - I just can't."

 

"Emma, I know you are scared but an abortion is not the solution - there can be so many complications while an abortion. I-" he stopped immediately when he saw her angry face. "Alright. How about you talk to Hook about it and we meet here again in a week?"

 

"I-" Emma looked at him defeated. She nodded and raised. "Okay."

 

"I see your distress, Emma but please think about everything - I know that Cygnet's birth was complicated, but-"

 

"Complicated? That's putting it mildly.“ Tears started to fall when Emma continued. "She nearly died, Whale - she was transferred to Boston because of so called complications. I wasn't able to stay with her, to hold her, to be there for her. When I finally was able to be transferred too, I stayed with her night and day. Every time I heard a heart monitor I was afraid that it was my baby. Every time I thought she might die. Hell, I nearly died because of the blood loss. I-.“

 

„Emma, I do understand your fears but you need to talk to Killian before you decide anything. It’s not only **your** baby, it’s not only **your** decision. Please try to stay rational, go home, talk to your husband, talk to your parents or whoever you want to but please don’t make any decisions before you haven’t spoken to anyone. That’s all I’m asking for.“

 

Emma wiped away her tears and left the hospital. She needed to see Killian. She didn’t want to be alone. Shaking her head because of the absurdity of the situation she drove home directly.

Emma Swan, the Saviour, knocked up again like a seventeen year old girl. But this time she didn’t want to hide or to not tell anyone. Now she wanted to share her feelings with her husband. The one who understood her better than she did sometimes. He needed to know, he had a right to know.

 

Ten minutes later she arrived at her home. David, Mary Margaret, Neal, Cygnet and Killian were playing outside, she could hear the laughter and David's truck was parked in front of the house.  
After one last glance in the rear mirror she stepped out of the car and into the house. Surprised she saw not only the five back in the yard but also Henry and Grace, Jefferson's daughter.

 

“Mom! Where have you been? We missed you, Cygnet missed you.” Emma offered him a smile but before she could answer Killian was by her side.

 

“You feeling better, love?” Emma avoided his eyes. She knew she would start crying when looking into his eyes.

 

“Can we talk inside?” She asked quietly but her plans were interrupted by her two-year-old daughter.

 

“Look, mummy. Got a dollie from nana.” She held up a Snow White doll and beamed at her mother.  
  
“Wow, Cygnet. That's wonderful. Show me.” She took the doll with trembling hands, still avoiding Killian's gaze who she could tell was staring at her concerned.

 

“Henny gave me a sword.” Cygnet went on, holding up a sword made out of foam. Emma looked at her son surprised but breathed out in relief when seeing that her toddler held up a pink, purple, green sword. “Daddy show me fight.”

 

Now Emma's eyes searched Killian's. He smirked at her but when he saw something in her eyes he frowned. “That's- that's wonderful, Cygnet. Did everyone already get cake?”

 

Cygnet shook her head. “Want cake. Henny want cake? Nealy want cake? Nana, gramps want cake? Daddy cake?” Suddenly nobody was able to stop Cygnet. She ran around asking everyone to have some cake. Emma smiled at her enthusiasm. She was happy that her daughter was happy. When Cygnet came back, telling her that everyone wanted cake, she stooped her up into her arms and cuddled her lovingly.

 

“I love you, Princess. Mommy loves you so much. I will go inside and get the cake and I also have a present for you. Can you be a good girl and play a bit longer with Neal and the others?”

 

“Yes, mommy. What you have for me?”

 

“You have to wait and see, birthday girl.” Emma kissed her daughter's nose and sat her back on the floor. She immediately ran to Neal.

Her uncle wasn't very pleased to play with her but it was her birthday and because of that he didn't complain.

 

Emma turned around, walking inside, followed by Killian who offered his help. The moment they were in the kitchen alone, Emma turned around and hugged her husband. Surprised he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. “Emma, is everything alright? You scare me, love. What did the doctor say?”

 

Emma knew that when she told him now, she wouldn't be able to stop the tears. She didn't want to ruin Cygnet's birthday. It was unfair enough that she had to leave the party because of her doctor's appointment. Now she only wanted to enjoy the rest of the day with her family.

 

She looked at Killian and kissed his cheek. “Can we talk after the party? I want to talk with you when Cygnet is asleep.” She stroked his cheek, pressing her lips on his. “Don't worry, this talk can wait until tonight.”

Killian nodded and kissed Emma's forehead. “Alright. How about you get Cygnet's presents and I do the cake.” Emma looked at him amused while he opened the refrigerator and closed it immediately. “Or maybe we switch parts.”

 

“Good idea. Although I was very curious how you get the cake out of the fridge without destroying it and with one hand.”

 

“Haha. Very funny, love. The gifts upstairs?”

 

“Bedroom, in the closet.” She called after him and applied herself to get the cake out of the fridge.

 

Moments later eight plates with cake, forks, napkins and also six steaming mugs with coffee and two hot chocolates (without cinnamon) were carried outside. The moment they stepped out, they started to sing “happy birthday”.

 

Cygnet was overwhelmed. She squealed in delight, bouncing in her grandfather's lap and clapping her hands while she listened to the song. When it was over she blew out the two candles on her piece of cake before she started to dig into the cake with her fork.

 

The rest of the afternoon went by quickly. Cygnet opened the rest of the presents. She got four more dolls, one Prince Charming, one Captain Hook and one which looked like Emma in the red dress she wore when she and Killian travelled back in time years ago. The last doll was a gift from Regina. To all surprise it was an Evil Queen doll with a red apple in her hand along with a real storybook.

Emma had also given her a dress and some stuff for her hair. Cygnet loved getting braids and Emma was more than willing to grant her wish in spending time with her doing her daughter's hair.

 

While Emma made her hair, Cygnet often talked and talked and talked about everything she could think of. Emma understood less than half of it but she couldn't bring herself in interrupting her enthusiastic, non understandable speeches.

 

When everyone said good bye, Cygnet didn't want to part from her grandparents. So Snow decided in taking her with them. Cygnet was more than happy and Emma was a bit relieved. Normally her daughter didn't sleep well after having such an eventful day – all the more she was thankful that she and Killian were able to have a quiet conversation without interruptions.

Henry and Violet also said good bye. Henry now was living in the Charming's old loft, as much as Emma loved having him around she knew she had to let him be independent and for himself.

 

When everyone was gone, she started to clean up the table. Killian helped her and within minutes they were done.

“Do you want some wine, love? We can sit outside and talk here if you want.”

 

Emma inhaled sharply. She shook her head but sat down nevertheless. She patted next to her and Killian sat down too. The moment Emma started to speak she got up again, restless she paced up and down on the porch. Biting her bottom lip and fiddling with her fingers – two signs for not being confident, for not feeling well.

 

She was nervous, she didn't know how to tell him and because of that she just said it. “I am pregnant.”

 

Killian's jaw dropped. He watched her pacing, closed and opened his mouth several times before he finally said something.

“You are pregnant – but how? I thought you were on birth control. Whale told us it will be safe. I don't understand.”

 

Emma sat down next to him, taking his good hand into hers. “No birth control is 100% safe, Killian. It can always happen and now... now we are pregnant and I-”

 

“You what, my love?” His eyes darted to hers. He seemed to know what she wanted to say but he tried to show no emotions.

 

“Can you remember what I told you when we finally were allowed to take Cygnet home?”

 

“Aye. You told me “no more children”, you- oh Emma.” The moment he said “no more kids” Emma started to cry heavily. She leant into him, the sobs shaking her violently. “Oh my love, everything is alright.” Emma only shook her head, unable to say anything at all. Killian held her close, he stroked her back, tried to comfort her as much as possible.

 

“What are we going to do about?” Emma asked weakly.

 

“Do about?” Killian looked at her confused and irritated. Emma nodded but didn't continue. How on Earth was she able to tell him that she was too afraid to get this baby? How could she explain what she was feeling without hurting him? She couldn't tell him about her thoughts to get an abortion, could she?

 

“Killian, I-” she couldn't stop the tears and Killian suddenly suggested to go inside. She nodded and followed him. She thought he might stay with her on the couch but instead he walked with her to their bedroom. He forced her to sit down, pulled off her shoes before she laid down. He followed her suit and pulled her close.

 

“You don't want to keep the baby, do you?!” Killian's words rang in her ears. Hearing these words coming out of his mouth made her feel nauseous. She didn't say anything only laid on the bed wrapped up in his arms. “It's okay, Emma. Please share your feelings with me. We need to talk about it, love.”

 

She turned around facing him. She stroked his cheek, looking into his too-blue-eyes, seeing so much love and assurance there that she again felt a wave of nausea again. She felt guilty, she felt bad and she hated herself and her feelings in this moment. “I am sorry,” she whispered, tears streaming down her face.

 

“Don't be, my love.” He kissed her forehead. Emma heard his wrecked voice. Her heart cracked and she untangled herself from him. She sat up, her feet planted on the carpet in front of the bed.

 

“I am a terrible person, Killian. I am a terrible mother and a terrible wife. You and Cygnet deserve so much more.”

 

Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder. “Don't say anything like that, love. I know that you are afraid and you and I also know that it would be a lie to say everything will be alright. I wasn't lying when I told you about two years ago that I was afraid in losing you and Cygnet. I wasn't lying either when I told you that I don't know what I'd done when I lost one of you. But now a new life is growing inside you, Emma. A life you and I created. A child which seems to be as stubborn as his mother and as a survivor as I am. Life found its way and now we will be parents again. Cygnet will have a sister or a brother. I know you are afraid, Emma, I am afraid too. More than afraid but only thinking about this new baby makes me wonder. Why did it happen? Why now? I think we should give it a try.”

 

“But what if something goes wrong, Killian? We nearly lost Cygnet and everyone assured us that everything was alright before I went into labour. I am so afraid. Afraid of losing this child, afraid of dying. I am not sure I am able to go through this again. I feel so alone, Killian.”

 

Killian wrapped his arms around the small frame of his wife. “You are not alone, Emma. I am with you the whole time. We will do everything to keep you and the wee one safe. You rest, you avoid stress, we do more check ups than necessary. I cannot destroy this life just because I am afraid of losing it. Please think about it, Emma. That's all I'm asking for.”

 

Now Emma chuckled. “What's so funny, love?”  
  
“Well, Whale used the exact same words.” She turned her head and got serious again. “Okay, I will think about it. Can we lay down a bit? Can you hold me?”

 

“Always.” They laid down, Killian holding Emma who placed her head on his heart listening to the strong heart beat. She thought about the first time they heard Cygnet's heart beat. A strong fast beat which made them speechless and happy. Killian was right. She couldn't get rid of this child. It was another kid made out of True Love. A kid willing to fight to live. Who was she to deny its wish?

 

She lifted her head and looked at Killian before she kissed his lips. “You are right, Killian. This baby is something precious. Not only something you and I created but also a strong fighter who is willing to live. But I can't do this alone.”

 

“You are not alone, Emma. I'll be with you – everyone will be there for you, for us, for Cygnet.” He kissed her again, wiping another tear off her face. “I love you, Emma.”

 

“I love you too, Killian.” She placed her head back on his chest, listening to the heartbeat which lulled her to sleep within minutes.

 

Killian on the other hand stayed awake, he stroked her hair absent-mindedly while he started to think about Emma and the baby. He quickly wiped away the tear which made its way down his cheek. He was afraid too. He was afraid of losing this new child and he was afraid of losing Emma. But he swore himself he wouldn't show his weakness. He had to be strong for her, for them, for his little family including his daughter.

He didn't know why but he felt that everything will be alright. In less than a year they will be four instead of three.

A smile grew on his face before he placed one last kiss into Emma's hair and fell asleep.


	10. transformation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> another chapter in the life of the Swan-Jones family 
> 
> Cygnet is already 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for the time jumps but as I stated at the beginning of the story, this will be a collection in no specific time line
> 
> I was a bit inspired by all the GoT pictures I saw on TUMBLR lately although I have never seen a single episode myself
> 
> and there is a new character: RYU Kintaro - he is Lilly's son (Malificent's grandson) and Cygnet's best friend

"Cygnet, Lilly's boy is here - he wants to speak with you," Emma's voice let her look up and out of the window. A smile appeared on her face.

 

"Coming!" She checked her appearance one last time in the mirror next to her door and rushed downstairs. Her caramel coloured hair bouncing off her shoulders. 

 

She looked at her mother who was doing the dishes, her father was nowhere in sight. "Mom, Ryu and I will have a talk on the porch, is that okay?"

 

"Sure, honey. Is he a friend or another curious boy who is just showing interest to get the full story?" Emma turned around facing her daughter.

 

"Mooom, would I answer the door if he was? He is one of the few friends I have in school," she started and added as quietly as possible, "maybe the only honest friend..." She looked up again and met her mother's eyes. 

 

"Just be careful, honey, okay? I don't want you to suffer anymore. Love you, Cygnet."

 

"I love you too, mom." With these words she left the house looking around to find Ryu sitting on the stairs in front of her house.

She stared a moment longer, smiling about the boy who she secretly had a crush on the last three years.

 

"Hey, utsukushii," his low, calming voice made her smile instantly.

 

"Hey, yourself. Come, let us go to the backyard. I don't want anybody to see us here."

 

Ryu's features fell for a second but then he got up and looked at her challenging. "Afraid of being seen with me?"

 

Cygnet looked down and shook her head. "No, more afraid of you being seen with me. People talk a lot lately, especially since they found out I am pregnant."

 

"Oh," he stepped closer, she could feel his closeness but he didn't hug or touch her. When she looked up again he only smiled at her genuine. "So if you feel more comfortable, let's go to the backyard. By the way - the Hollywood swing is much more comfortable than these stairs."

 

Cygnet snorted and took his hand but let go the moment she realised what she had done. He didn't seem to mind and followed her, plopping down on the swing. 

Cygnet sat down on one of the chairs so she was able to look at him.

They fell into a comfortable silence,  watching he birds in the yard, enjoying the quiet and the cool breeze from the ocean.

 

"So, whose the father?" Cygnet turned her head slowly and looked at her best friend shocked. She opened and closed her mouth several times before a big fat tear escaped her eye. 

She felt hurt and disappointed. She never thought Ryu would be one of these boys.

 

"I think you should go now," she got up and turned around heading towards the backdoor.

 

"Cygn, wait! I am sorry, I just don't get it. You tell me everything and suddenly you withhold that you have a boyfriend and that you had sex and that you are pregnant? You are a smart girl so I really don't understand and I... I want to understand..."

 

With her hand on the doorknob and tears in her eyes she turned to her best friend. "I answer the question, when you answer mine first. And I won't tell you until you agree."

 

Ryu stepped from one foot to the other eyeing his best friend closely. "Fine, I'll answer your question."

 

Cygnet let go of the door handle and leaned against the post next to the steps to the yard. "Can you- do you- I mean..." she was looking at her feet not sure how to ask.

 

Suddenly she felt a hand on her upper arm. "Hey, you can ask me anything you want and I will answer as honest as possible." The air between them started to vibrate when she looked up again. He was so close she could feel his body heat radiating from him. She lifted her arm and touched his bare forearm.

 

"Does it hurt when you transform?" Ryu stepped back, his eyes wide in shock, his jaw dropped. 

 

"I- I-", he closed his mouth, turned around and took a deep breath. "I cannot transform into a dragon. I am only half dragon." Suddenly he looked at her disappointed. "I wish I could. Sometimes I feel like I don't belong here, I-"

 

Cygnet took his hand and sat down on the steps, pulling him down to sit next to her. She didn't let go of his hand, their knees touched but she didn't look up. 

 

"I understand. I think I feel similar. I found out who my parents and grandparents really are with about nine. It was a shock first and I waited for the moment they tell me I have magic or I will get my own castle or I don't know, stupid thoughts of a child but nothing happened. I am still the average girl nobody is interested in except I am the daughter of Captain Hook and the Saviour and the sister of the Author and granddaughter of Snow White and Prince Charming." A tear escaped her eye, rolling down her cheek when she looked up again. "A silly girl who got knocked up with sixteen." 

A sob escaped her mouth and Ryu couldn't hold back any longer. He pulled her into a hug and let her cry. 

 

He comforted her by stroking her back, continuing his own story. "You know, I found out who my grandma is by mistake. She and Lilly had a big fight and I overheard Lilly yelling that it didn't matter if she once was the big Malificent or not - here she is just a normal human being and she had no idea what a burden it is to be a mother who has to raise a child by her own because the father is always on business trips. She also yelled at her that grandma had no idea how hard it is to keep the secret of being a dragon hidden from her husband and son."

 

Cygnet burrowed her face in the crook of his neck, mumbling against his hot skin. "I am sorry. I didn't know that."

 

He stroked her hair and kissed her cheek before he continued. "I confronted them the next day and Lilly started to blame grandma. I was so angry at her and suddenly I did kind of transform, making Lilly more than angry and grandma smile."

 

Cygnet pushed herself off him to get a better look. "What happened?"

 

"My skin changed. It began to be thicker and shiny like scales. It's like an armour. But it vanished after I calmed down again."

 

"Were you afraid?" Cygnet wiped her nose on her sleeve, leaning back but never letting go of his hand.

 

"You can bet on it. I locked myself in my room the rest of the day until grandma knocked on my door that evening telling me they will explain everything when I come downstairs. Since then I know everything about my family, this town and their citizens."

 

Cygnet nodded. Her view wandered over the green backyard again, she wasn't able to look at her best friend right now. Her mom and dad were the only ones who knew the truth and now she was going to tell her best friend.

She pressed her lips into a thin line.

 

"Jeremy Thompson is the father", Cygnet began without looking at him. "He asked me out a few month ago, it was the day you were so disappointed because you had two tickets for the carnival." Her voice grew quiet again. "I should have taken your offer. I was so stupid. I made the two biggest mistakes of my life. I hurt you and I slept with him although I didn't even want to."

 

Ryu's brows raised. "What do you mean, you didn't want to? Did he- Cygnet, did this asshole rape you?"

 

Ryu withdrew his hand getting up and started walking up and down. He didn't even hear her following words - he was only going on and on how stupid he was, that he should have known and should have protected her.

 

Cygnet got up and touched his arm again. His head snapped around until their eyes met. "Calm down Ryu, please don't be mad at me."

 

"Oh koibito, please, don't think I am mad at **you** ," he pulled her into a hug, holding her close. "I could never be angry with you or mad at you."

 

"Shall I tell you the whole truth?" Ryu nodded. "But you have to promise me not to dash off and hunt Jeremy down."

 

"Do you have feelings for him?" Ryu's voice was full of hurt and fear.

 

"No, but my parents already did the job for you and I really think he learned his lesson. His father was so angry with him, he is grounded for the rest of the school year, he has to do community work and he has to pay for the baby when it's born. I don't want him in my life, but I also cannot get rid of this little duckling inside me."

 

She looked at her growing belly, rubbed softly the slight swelling and looked up again when Ryu placed his hand on hers. They smiled at each other, not saying anything at all.

 

A cold breeze pushed Cygnet back in his arms. They sat down again and he laid his jacket around her shoulders to shield her from the cold.

 

"When Jeremy asked me out, I was so surprised and overwhelmed, I didn't question his intentions. Now I know I should have doubted his motives from the very moment he asked." She sighed and shifted a bit. "We wanted to eat at Granny's and then go to the drive-in theatre. Everything was great, he even bought me ice cream before we headed to the drive-in theatre." She sniffed, looking at Ryu again. "The moment the movie started he kissed me and my world fell apart. One of the hottest guys in school was really interested in me and also kissed me. He pushed the right buttons and made me believe he liked me." Another sob fell from her lips and she looked up to stop the tears from falling. "When he started touching me I wanted to tell him to stop. I wasn't ready for it but I also didn't want to back out. I thought when I let him touch my boobs he will stop."

 

"But he didn't," Ryu stated shocked, looking at his best friend who only shook her head. "Didn't you tell him after that?"

 

"I- I really wanted to but I- I was so afraid, I couldn't, I was so afraid of being the silly little girl who chickened out - I didn't want to be the gossip of the whole school and now I am exactly that... just for other reasons."

 

"I'm going to kill him! He touched you, he slept with you without permission - he should have stopped, he should have seen that you didn't like it - he..." 

 

Ryu stepped back looking at her furiously while Cygnet eyed him afraid. She tried to calm him down, to tell him that everything is going to be alright, that it doesn't matter anymore. That he didn't rape her that she just was too afraid to tell him to stop. That this idiot wasn't worth a fight.

 

But Ryu only snorted angrily, his eyes lightened up and he turned around. 

"Ryu, I am sorry, don't be mad, please calm down, please, I- **oh my god!** "

 

Cygnet's eyes widened, she stared at the boy in front of her who suddenly got bigger and bigger, whose skin suddenly turned dark and into scales. Before she knew what happened a huge dragon stood in their backyard, looking around furiously. Smoke was coming out of his nostrils.

 

"Oh my god, Ryu!" The eyes of the dragon snapped towards her. He bent down, smoke still coming out of his nose. Cygnet got up and came closer. "Calm down, Ryu, calm down. You need to calm down so you can transform yourself back. Everything is alright."

 

The dragon snorted, never leaving his eyes off of her. 

 

"MOM! Mom, we have a problem out here! You need to call Lilly..." The dragon started to shake his head vigorously. "...or better Mal!" Cygnet added.

 

The next moment the backdoor opened and Emma and Killian came outside. Their mixed curses filled the air, making the dragon flinch. 

 

"Ryu, look at me - look.at.me. Ignore them and concentrate on my voice. Please." He looked back at his best friend who was now standing and coming closer. He stepped back again, the trees behind him bending, branches breaking and falling down, covering the ground. 

 

"Stop, Ryu, calm down. Your grandma will be here soon. Lay down and let me help you, please."

 

"Cygnet, don't step closer. He doesn't know what he is doing - he can't control his powers." The voice of her mother pierced the silence.

The dragon snorted again, laying down, waiting.

 

"See. I trust him, mom. Dad, everything is alright. He is still Ryu." Cygnet stepped forward, her hand reached out. She made baby steps, her heart pounding in her chest. She was afraid but she didn't want to admit it. "Ryu, I'm going to touch you now."

 

Her hand finally touched his smooth skin. She stroked his long head, his eyes were still fixated on her. She whispered soothing words, encouraging him to calm down, thanking him that he cared so much for her that he wanted to protect and defend her. 

She inched closer and closer until her whole body was pressed against his enormous body. 

 

He lifted his left wing, covering her body gently. He growled lowly, closing his eyes.

 

"I love you," Cygnet whispered, a single tear escaping her eye. The moment it touched his skin something started again. Cygnet was dizzy, she closed her eyes, nearly losing her balance because of the wind which swirled around her.

 

"I love you too, Cygnet," Ryu's voice was soft and quiet, he pulled her into a hug, holding her tight. 

 

"That was surprising," Malificent's voice let the two teenagers look up. "I have never seen a young dragon transform back that quickly and easily. I am very proud of you, Ryu. But we definitely need to talk and we should include your mother."

 

Ryu looked at Cygnet and kissed her lips briefly. "I am sorry."

 

"Don't be. I am happy you are alright again and it was great seeing your true self. You are beautiful." She blushed and he wrapped his arms around her one more time before he broke the hug and went to Malificent.

 

"Mrs. Jones, Mr. Jones, I am sorry for- the mess, I'll promise to come back at least tomorrow to clean up."

 

"It's alright, lad. I am glad you didn't harm anyone or yourself," Killian's eyes fell on his daughter who was still standing in the middle of their garden.

 

"I could never hurt her," Ryu mumbled when he followed his grandmother making Killian and Emma smile.

 

"Cygnet, darling - come inside, lets have some hot chocolate." Emma opened her arm so her daughter was able to slip under it and meld into her side.

 

* * *

 

 

Cygnet’s eyes were glued to the mug containing the hot steaming liquid she so loved but yet hadn't touched it at all.

 

"What happened, Cygnet? Why was he so angry that he transformed into a dragon?"

 

Her father's voice was calm but stern. She knew lying would be wrong now. They had decided that nobody else will hear the truth about the pregnancy but now she broke her promise.

 

 

Cygnet looked up, her eyes filled with tears. "I told him the truth about the night I got pregnant."

 

"Oh, Cygnet. We decided to keep it a secret, why did you tell him?" Emma looked at their daughter expectantly.

 

"Because he is my best friend and I trust him and because I- I lo-," she looked down again, tears forming in her eyes. "I am sorry I know I promised not to tell anyone but he is my closest friend, it's Ryu we are talking about and it felt right telling him."

 

Her sobs were too much for both of her parents, they got up and cowered themselves next to her chair, hugging her from both sides.

 

"It's alright, sweetheart. We understand. We are glad you feel safe enough with him to share your secret with him." Her mothers voice was soothing, she stroked her head and pressed a kiss to her temple.

 

"I am proud of you, Cygnet, how you handled the dragon situation outside. Bloody hell, I am not sure I would have stayed that calm."

 

Cygnet beamed at her father sniffing.

"It was my fault and he didn't even know that he could transform into a dragon - he was as afraid as me."

 

Both of their parents shared a look over her daughter's head before they hugged her again.

 

"We love you, Cygnet and we are proud of you." 

 

She nodded but she didn't feel like she deserved such a praise. She had failed her parents by sleeping with a boy without protection and getting pregnant. It was something she was remembered of every time she looked at her swelling belly.

 

"I think I will lay down a bit," she got up and looked at her parents one last time before she climbed the stairs to her room.

 

Killian helped Emma up and pulled her into a hug. "Seems as we now have a dragon in our family. How lovely."

 

Emma laughed and looked up into her husband's blue eyes. "At least the baby won't be one - that's for sure and maybe it's a good thing she has someone to protect her. Someone by her side when we fail again."

 

Killian closed his eyes and pulled her closer. He knew that Emma blamed herself for her daughter's circumstance and he knew it will last another bit for her to finally realise that it wasn't her fault.

 

Cygnet who had witnessed the short conversation of her parents sighed sadly and went upstairs into her room.

She hoped that Ryu was okay and that they would have time to talk again before school starts on Monday.

 


	11. the baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cygnet gives birth to her baby

“Mom? I am scared. I am so so so scared.” Cygnet was sitting in the swing next to her mother, her hands resting on her large stomach.

 

“I know, baby. I know how you feel. I was not much older than you and I was alone. Cygnet, darling, you are _not_ alone. When this little baby enters the world it will be surrounded by so much love.”

 

Cygnet nearly chocked on a sob which transformed into a laugh within seconds. “Grandma is so excited. I think she is even more nervous than I am.”

 

Emma stroked her daughter's back. “Yeah, that may be right. I think the list of baby names she made is even longer as the one they had when you were born. Have you decided yet? You are the only one who knows what it is going to be.”

 

“And Granny. She insisted in making a baby blanket and I told her the sex and name of the baby.” Her mother looked at her shocked and hurt but she quickly pulled herself together.

 

“Hm, so Granny knows, yeah?!”   
  
“Oh mom, please don't be mad, I- oww” Cygnet sat up straight, looking at her stomach.

 

“What's wrong, honey?” Emma looked at her concerned. She had already noticed that the belly of her daughter went down a bit, a clear sign of going into labour soon, but she still had a week and a half to go.

 

“Nothing, I think it kicked me a bit harder than usual, that's all.”

 

“You sure?”

 

Cygnet looked at her mother smiling. “Yes, mom, I am sure. But I think I will lay down a bit, my back is killing me and everyone tells me to find as much rest as possible until the little one is here.”

 

Emma nodded and kissed her girl's head. “If you need anything, just call me. I am downstairs cleaning the kitchen. You father and brother left a bit of a mess last night.” She chuckled and watched her daughter disappear into the house nodding.

Emma closed her eyes briefly. She was scared to hell. She was not ready to be a grandmother and after a conversation with David at the station today she knew he wasn't ready to be a grand-grandfather. Not with having kids as old as Cygnet on his own.

 

Emma got up, she knew she needed to be strong. For Cygnet, for her dad, for Killian and everyone else. The next few months would be hard and even with everyone helping, Cygnet was still a kid herself. She didn't know half of the world yet and being a mom, no matter what age, was exhausting.

Emma started cleaning while her daughter sat on her bed crying.

 

Cygnet looked through the baby album Ryu made her, there were all sonograms in it and also pictures of her growing belly and other stuff. Ryu was great. He helped her through the hardest times, he was by her side whenever she needed him. He went to all doctors appointments with her and never questioned any requests from her.

She still felt awful that she she did disappoint everyone who cared for her. She could remember the day she told her parents. She could remember all the moments she saw the disappointment in their eyes.

 

“ _Mom, is dad home?” Cygnet walked down the stairs slowly, looking around and fiddling with her fingers.  
Emma looked up concerned, she was going through some paperworks but when she saw the feared expression on her daughter's face she closed the file immediately._

 

“ _Killian should be home any minute, what's wrong, honey?”_

 

_Although she wanted to wait for her father to be home to not explaining herself twice she broke down this very moment. She sat down on the stairs, her body shaking violently with sobs._

 

“ _I am so so so sorry, mom. I am so so so sorry,” was all she repeated over and over again. Emma was with her in an instant, she crouched down next to her, pulling her into a hug._

 

“ _Cygnet, you are scaring me, what's wrong? What happened?”_

 

_Cygnet took a deep breath and took all her courage in both hands. Looking up, meeting her mother's concerned eyes she opened her mouth, closing it again before she finally said it._

 

“ _Mom, I am pregnant.” She thought her mother would yell or cry or do anything like that but the only thing she did was hugging her again, comforting her and telling her that everything was okay. She held her for a while before Emma finally looked at her again smiling softly, putting a strand behind her daughter's ear._

 

“ _Mom, what am I going to do about it?” She could see the love in her mother's eyes. The same love she knew from her father._

 

“ _Do you want that child?” Emma's soft voice calmed her again although she knew that when she was telling her parents the whole truth she would need even more courage._

 

“ _Well, I- I don’t know.” Cygnet's voice shook, she was so afraid. Getting knocked up was one thing when there was a boyfriend but there was none and the truth was she really didn't know what to do. How could she get rid of this little bean inside her but on the other hand she never wanted that all to happen._

 

“ _Cygnet, are you okay?”_

 

“ _I- I am so afraid, mum. The whole thing was a mistake. I- I-”_

 

_Emma saw unshed tears in her daughters eyes._

 

“ _A mistake? Cygnet, what are you talking about? Tell me, honey, please.“_

 

“ _I- I-,” Cygnet looked up and suddenly saw her dad enter the house. “Oh my god...“_

 

_The next moment she bolted towards her room, she couldn’t face him now, she couldn’t face any of her parents anymore. She slowly climbed out of the window, her backpack over her shoulders._

 

_When her feet touched the ground she ran - she didn’t look back, she didn’t look around. She needed space, she needed time for herself. She needed to be alone. She ran to her safe haven - the Jolly Roger._

 

Cygnet rubbed her belly. “Calm down, sweetheart, everything is alright. Why are you so restless?” She took a deep breath and sought for a better position but couldn't find one. She groaned. Again she rolled over and over again but she couldn't find a comfortable position.

 

She slowly went downstairs again finding her mother talking to her father. Cygnet didn't understand a word but she saw the furrowed brows of her mom when she entered the room.

 

"What's wrong, mom?" Cygnet grabbed an apple and took a bite but laid it down the very same moment feeling not able to eat it.

 

"I have to go to the station. David needs me but I don't want to leave." She turned around and looked at her daughter while she wiped her hands on a towel.

"You mother thinks the baby will come the very moment she leaves us alone for a moment," her father joked making Cygnet smile.

 

"Oh come on, mom, go to work. You'll see the baby won't come for at least another week. Dr. Henrik said so too." Cygnet came to her mom and kissed her cheek. "I love you mom, but you cannot protect me from everything."

 

Emma's look said everything and Cygnet flinched automatically when her words dawned her. How could she be so rude, so reckless? Hadn't she hurt her parents enough the past few months? She withdrew her hand and turned around. "I'm sorry," she mumbled and sat down, not able to look at any of her parents any longer.

 

"Oh little love, don't do that. I know this look from your mom. You didn't do anything wrong and you have to stop blaming yourself. Yes you made a mistake but you were brave enough to tell us and you face the consequences. You could have chose the easy path but you didn't. And Cygnet, love, don't think you disappointed us or that you hurt us. We love you, no matter what. We will always love you and be there for you. And now come here, little love."

 

He opened his arms and Cygnet pushed back her stool and fled into his arms. "I love you, daddy!" The sobs of his daughter broke his heart but he knew it was important that she heard the words (again). He had told her over and over again that they are not disappointed in her but she never believed them and he hoped this time she finally believed his words.

 

He exchanged a warm look with his wife before he nodded towards the door. Emma understood, kissed Cygnet's hair and told her how much she loved her before she went to the sheriff station.

 

Killian held his daughter a while longer until Cygnet looked up and wiped her tears.

"I am sorry, dad. I know you and mom love me and you are always there for me but nevertheless I feel like I let you down."

 

He kissed her forehead and led her to the couch to find a much more comfortable position. "Come here, little one. Tell me why you think you disappointed us."

 

"Well, first of all I had sex. Second I did it without protection and now I am pregnant. So three disappointments because of one lousy decision." She winched when she felt another kick of the baby.

 

Killian put his hand on hers looking into her eyes. "You know, Cygnet, we know we cannot protect you from everything and that you have to make your own decisions but after you told us that you had been afraid of telling Jeremy to stop before you two had sex, we questioned ourselves because we thought we gave you more confidence. We never were mad at you - we- Cygnet?"

 

He looked at Cygnet who suddenly was bending over, holding her stomach.

 

"Daddy, I think something's wrong." she looked up but another sharp pain made her close her eyes.

 

"How does it feel, love?"

 

"It's like someone is stabbing me with a knife," she held his hand and squeezed hard.

 

"Alright, stay calm, darling. How long do you have these pain already?"

 

Cygnet frowned. When she was honest she felt something like that the whole day, her back was aching and she thought the baby was more active than usual but what if...

 

"Dad, are these contractions? I- I think I have these for the whole day. But they weren't that -owww...," tears started to form in Cygnet's eyes.

 

"Alright, let's stay calm," Killian repeated himself and looked at his daughter. He called an ambulance always watching his daughter. "Okay, sweetheart, they say as long as your water isn't broken everything is okay."

 

Cygnet nodded. The pain was fading again, she relaxed and leant back, still holding her father's hand who was calming her immensely.

 

"Dad I need to pee," Cygnet suddenly said and got up. Killian nodded but after two steps he noticed Cygnet's pale face followed by a little yelp.

 

"Cygnet?"

 

"I am sooo sorry, I- I think I wet myself, I- oh god I am so sorry - that's so embarrassing." Cygnet started to cry and shook her head, her cheeks burned with a deep shade of red.

 

"No, baby, you didn't wet yourself, everything is alright. Your water just broke. You need to lie down and wait for the ambulance." He helped her back to the couch but Cygnet shook her head.

 

"Can you... can you get me another pair of pants, please?"

 

"Of course, darling, but you need to lie down."

 

"But I don't want to ruin the couch."

 

"You won't but if you feel more comfortable, lie down on the floor, just LIE DOWN!" He didn't want to sound so harsh but he was nervous and he was afraid and he wasn't sure what to do exactly.

He loved his little girl but this was a exceptional situation.

 

He rushed upstairs and grabbed fresh sweatpants and also fuzzy socks. He could remember Emma being very cold during labour.

When he was downstairs again he helped Cygnet undress and also helped her to put on the new clothes. (Although Cygnet protested at first but after another contraction she accepted his help.)

 

He could tell she was in pain and he could tell she was holding back. "Darling, don't hold back. Try to relax and think about something happy, something wonderful which makes you relax even further." He combed through her hair asking himself where the ambulance was.

 

Cygnet smiled at him and closed her eyes. The next moment Killian and she nearly fell off the much smaller cod on the Jolly Roger.

 

"Bloody hell, what happened?" Killian looked around realising they no longer were at home - they were on the Jolly Roger in the Captain Quarters. "Darling what did you do?"

 

"I- I was just thinking about my happy place, my safe haven. The Jolly Roger is my safe haven and I- dad what's going on? I am so scared. Everything is screwed up."

 

"Stay calm, Cygnet. I will call the ambulance to change directions and then we will bring you to the hospital in no time."

 

Cygnet nodded but she didn't know if she could believe him. Killian went to the other side of the room to speak on the phone. When he was back he furrowed his brows. "Little love, they told me

I have to check on your status. They-"

 

"What? No. You will not- I- oww, daddy!" Cygnet closed her eyes again, she exhaled sharply and searched for Killian's hand.

 

"Cygnet, darling. I know this is an awkward situation but I need to make sure you and the baby are okay."

 

"But you are my dad," Cygnet whined.

 

"I know and believe me, this is the least I want to do but it doesn't matter now. The only thing which matters is that you and the little one are okay and I can see you are in pain, Cygnet, and I don't want to lose you because of your stubbornness."

 

"Lose me? Dad!" A shiver ran down her spine while she stared at her father with wide eyes.

 

"No no no, darling calm down. I just meant you are as stubborn as your mother and I really need to check on you. NOW!"

 

Cygnet nodded slowly and closed her eyes. "Okay."

 

Killian took a deep breath and pulled down his daughter's trousers. He tried to steady his nerves but that was easier said than done.

 

"Darling, we kind of have a situation here. I don't think you will deliver the baby in the hospital."

 

"Dad! This isn't helping. Not a bit. You said to calm down but now I am afraid and I don't think I can relax at all. I want my mom!"

 

Killian's eyes widened. He had completely forgotten to inform Emma about everything. "Alright, Cygnet, take a deep breath. I will call her and-"

 

"NO! I want my mom. NOW!" Cygnet screamed suddenly, making Killian flinch. Before he was able to respond Emma stood in front of them, looking around irritated.

 

"Killian? What's going on? How do I come here, what-? Oh my god, Cygnet." She rushed to her daughter who was still lying on the cod crying.

 

Killian tried his best to stay calm and explained the situation to Emma.

 

"Okay, so darling, let me see how far you are."

 

"I think the baby is ready to come," Killian's sentence took Emma off guard but she tried to compose herself. She looked at him if she wanted to say "you looked yourself already?" and Killian only nodded.

 

"Okay Killian can you go on deck and look for the ambulance, please? I think I need a moment with our daughter - alone."

 

Killian kissed his women on their foreheads and hurried upstairs. Emma tried to calm Cygnet and explained that it was important for her to relax.

She was about the check on her daughter's status when Killian came back.

 

"Are they here already?" Emma asked relieved but when she saw Killian's pale face she knew something was wrong. "What is it, Killian?"

 

"We are on open water, darling - I have no clue where we are or how we ended here." He looked at Cygnet. "Baby, you need to concentrate yourself and bring us back to the harbour, please."

 

"I- owww! Mommy!" Cygnet stared at her mother with wide eyes, „it hurts, it hurts so much like, like - I don't know - it's an odd feeling. I- I am so scared and I want it to end. Now!"

 

"Calm down, sweetheart, calm down. Your father and I will help you get through it. It will hurt, yes, but when you hold your baby the first time and hear it cries you will forget all the pain. I promise. Now concentrate and do what we say, okay?"

 

Emma dialled Dr. Whales number - he was the only one who understood that there was magic involved and she hoped he could guide her as good as Dr. Henrik, Cygnet's ob-gyn.

 

He picked up after the third beep and to Emma's surprise helped her without hesitation. He had already delivered Neal and also Robin and Cygnet, so Emma was confident that he would do his job properly.

 

"Daddy, can I hold your hand, please?" Cygnet asked quietly and Killian obeyed instantly. He kissed her forehead and started to stroke her hair with his artificial hand. "I am so afraid but I am happy you are here with me. I love you, dad."

 

He kissed her again and smiled at her before his eyes wandered to Emma.

She held the phone between head and shoulder and pulled up the blanket (with which Killian had covered their daughter before).

 

Cygnet felt awful. While her mother talked to the doctor on the phone she tried to think of something calming - she tried to focus on the baby and on Emma’s words that when it all was over she wouldn’t remember the pain she now was feeling.

 

„Cygnet!“ Her eyes snapped open again. She looked at her mother who was eyeing her worried. „Baby, you have to stay with us and you have to focus on your contractions and with the next contraction you need to push.“

 

„Push? You mean? No, I- I can’t. What- what if something goes wrong? What if-?“

 

„Cygnet, look at me. You know your mom and I faced so many dangerous villains and situations but you can trust us. Everything is going to be alright. I promise.“ Cygnet nodded and tucked on Killian’s hand so he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. „I love you, Cygnet and I will never let anything happen to you.“

 

„Mom, there is a contraction coming, I-" Cygnet closed her eyes and squeezed Killian's hand the next moment.

 

"Great, you are doing great, Cygnet. Now push- push- push, baby." With Emma's encouraging words combined with Whales instructions and also Killian's help, Cygnet's baby was delivered in no time.

 

"It's a girl," Emma beamed at her daughter before her eyes drifted to Killian. "A baby girl. Congratulations."

 

Killian kissed Cygnet's forehead. "Well done, sweetheart, well done."

 

Emma put the baby on Cygnet's upper body when they suddenly heard voices from above deck.

Killian knitted his brows but the same time he went up deck to check where the voices came from.

 

"I am very proud of you, honey," Emma said and sat next to her daughter and granddaughter. "She is beautiful."

 

"Thanks mom," she stroked her baby's head and placed a kiss on its delicate skin. While she was talking to her, Cygnet didn't even realise that two paramedics entered the quarters and started to prepare her and the newborn for their transportation to the hospital.

 

"Hello baby. I'm your mommy. Your grandma is right, you _are_ beautiful and she was also right that almost all pain is forgotten. I love you so much, little bean." She still stroked her baby's cheek when Killian softly placed a hand on her upper arm.

 

"Cygnet, darling, the paramedics need to take you to hospital now. I'm riding with you if this is okay and your mum will follow with her car."

 

"Sure, dad," she beamed at him. "She has your eyes," she suddenly said and looked at her daughter.

 

"Most newborn have blue eyes, we will have to wait a few weeks until we can tell for sure, but she is as beautiful as you and your mother." He squeezed her shoulder and followed the paramedics who took her to the ambulance.

 

Before he followed his daughter, he hugged his wife and kissed her. "I love you so much, Emma, you did a great job."

She kissed him and nodded. "So did you, grandpa."

 

Killian wanted to say something but the very same moment a paramedic called after him.

 

On the ride he watched his daughter interact with her newborn daughter.

 

"Does she have a name yet?" The paramedic asked smiling.

 

Cygnet looked at her father and back at her daughter. "Her name is Cordelia."

 

"Lovely name," the paramedic said and checked some monitors.

 

"How appropriate," her father chuckled making Cygnet raise her brows. "Cordelia means _daughter of the sea_ and she for sure _is_ a daughter of the sea."

 

Cygnet beamed at him. She knew that her father would like the name. That was one of the reasons she chose it after finding out that it's going to be a girl.

 

By the time they arrived at the hospital not only Emma, Snow and Charming were waiting for them also Granny with Cordelia's blanket in her hands and Ryu with a bouquet of red roses awaited them.

 


End file.
